by April Rameé | Feb 12, 2016 | Art, Mystical, Poetry, Travel
A path emerges,
deep jungle.
step by step.
Each rock fallen into perfect space.
Flowers bloom with the scent of
danger, love, delicate promises, on the tip of their lips.
Trickling water laps over the stones;
as hard surfaces give way to smoothness
The Sun’s rays split emerald canopies, offering rainbows in water drops.
Down this path…
Wounds, sorrow, and guilt,
shed as the beauty and harmony of mother earth demands your agony abandoned at her doorstep.
Heavy baggage burns in the fire of purification.
A scorching flame found within the heart.
Blazing naked, one arrives to the edge.
Gazing out into passionate expansiveness, a point of suspension.
The limitless feeling, the void, and adrenaline all mingled into an expression of
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
WHAT IF ‘I’ DOES NOT EXIST?
by April Rameé | Nov 18, 2015 | Mystical, Travel, Warrior
Star Date 1.28.4.13 Kin 210
White Lunar Dog
I polarize in order to love
Stabilizing loyalty
I seal the process of heart
With the lunar tone of challenge
I am guided by the power of spirit
I am a galactic activation portal enter me
The road to this trailhead is windy, narrow, unpaved, bumpy, and full of pines and stars. The scent is overwhelming peaceful, as I am crammed in the back seat with César as we slowly creep closer to Clear Creek trailhead. Thinking about the energy for the day, a White Dog GAP day, and how I am a White Self-Existing dog. I feel a deep love for my dear friend, spiritual brother, and an innate loyalty our soul contract requires. We are embarking upon a challenge guided by spirit set by an intention I made many years ago when I discovered Mt. Shasta existed, to climb up there, spend a night or two, and meditate for hours with the spirit of the mountain. My intention is similar to César’s, whose goal is to hike to the summit of the mountain.
Ali and Michelle drop us off at 21:27 at the Clear Creek trailhead. We prep our gear, fill out forms, and grab poop bags! WHAT?! I must be crazy. I am about to start a hike in the evening through woods I never seen before, with animals, and no way to use a bathroom except on a piece of paper with a target and bag to put human waste in. I pray I do not need to use the bathroom but at the same time I feel excitement for the journey. We start the hike at 21:35, an ascent from below the tree line to above the tree line is the goal before midnight. Headlamp leads the way as we wind through the dark tree line. Looking up to see the stars during occasional breaks. I see the moon hidden amongst the tree line, low in the sky, large, warm yellow orange peak through tree line at times as we twist and turn through the tall pine forest. The moon is in Gemini on the eastern horizon. While in the western horizon Vega is bright in the sky and is a constant companion as we hike in the dark, leading the way towards Mt. Shasta’s peak.
22:11 – We are at a clearing and the waning gibbous moon is higher in the sky with Orion chasing after the moon. Vega still sits above the top of Mt. Shasta and we almost don’t need a headlamp to light the path. Shasta’s snowy peak gleams and beams in the night sky and only if my camera could capture the beauty, the stillness, the peace.
23:15 – A slow ascent but we are at a full clearing and Vega begins to set beyond the peak of Shasta. I see a red shooting star beam into the mountain and feel a sense of accomplishment for taking on an adventure outside of my comfort zone, but something I’ve always dreamed about. I recall a friend who I associate shooting stars with and know that he is right there with me at that moment experiencing the epic night sky through my senses and is guiding me on the path with love. The idea of being on this mountain so high up watching the sky rotate as we revolve around the Earth’s axis brings an eternal smile to my face. I know that when I am older and smile lines are etched in my skin this is one of the experiences that helped mark me with the beauty of that wrinkle. What more is there to life?
Star Date 1.28.4.14 Kin 211
Blue Electric Monkey
I activate in order to play
Bonding illusion
I seal the process of magic
With the electric tone of service
I am guided by the power of vision
I am a galactic activation portal enter me
00:00 – Happy Halloween! We are above the tree line and hear the babbling creek, which means there is water and we are close to where we should camp for the evening. The moon is high in the sky and lights our way as we abandoned the headlamp for the moon an hour ago. On the left of the trail appears to be the perfect spot to camp, soft, not too many rocks, some small bushes to block part of the wind. We collect water from the stream and set up camp. I purposefully make sure the tent doors are facing the East and West. East towards the mountain range horizon where the continuous stars emerges from the other side of the world. The west contains the peak of Mt. Shasta, which I stare at before going to sleep in awe at the beauty of the snow-covered peak reflecting the brightness of the moon.
05:00 – Alarm goes off. The sun is still asleep lighting the other part of the world, but Venus, Jupiter, and Mars look so beautiful in the sky in Virgo. Almost in a straight line in the sky and I honor Venus and the planets and stars as I step out into the cold morning air. The moon illuminates but not so much that I can’t see the stars. Orion is still in the sky following the moon closer to the peak of Mt. Shasta and it is one of the most beautiful sights in my life. The early morning sky with Venus my lover up high in the east, what more is there to life? Seriously? I fall back to sleep and dream prophetic visions of which are too hard to explain.
06:55 – I open the tent door and the colors are magnificent. A yellow, orange hue of early first sunrise. The planets are still out to play. César preps and leaves for his ascent higher as I keep the tent door open after walking around some to watch the sun rise with protection from the cold and wind. Sun gazing is always amazing but on this mountain with the peak of Mt. Shasta behind me and the mountain ranges in front of me….the first rays of the sun comes over the mountains. I have seen some beautiful sunrises before but this one is definitely in the top 5. This is why I came here; to see the stars, to see the sunrise, to feel the mountain energy as I sleep under peak, to feel the vibrations and sound of the mountain, to see the patterns unknown to my eyes while I stare at the sun restructuring and it strengthens my eyes. The dreams are so intense on the mountain; old lovers, friends, and people I never met before visit me. We frolic on adventures and rejoice in peace and love. I stay awake until 8am forgetting today is a Rainbow Meditation day and yet I some how feel a surge of energy as I am in deep meditation around this time. Eventually I fall back into a state of visions and dreams.
10:00 – I emerge from the tent finally and the moon is still out. I watch it set beyond the peak in less than 3 min. I look around my surroundings; the full day sun is much different than the night, early morning, and sunrise. There is a rock, which I thought at one point in the night, was a bear, I yelled at it in the evening, but seeing it as a large rock now I laugh at myself and think this is where I am spending my day. Perched on the rock to stretch, lay out my crystals for charging, write poetry, meditate, and lay out and slab. Slab is a term I use for laying on rocks which capture the sun’s heat and transfer the warmth into my body. Therefore, I am smack in the middle of warmth from the sun and the rock. It works quite nicely all over the world in many locations.
11:00 – I sit here and write after a short yoga session on the massive rock, which obviously fell down from the peak. Crystals charge facing the peak, I listen to the sounds of the mountain; the wind, comes into my ears and tells me the secrets of the mountain, the water cascades down small bubbling creek in the distance, the tress below are rustling to one another with the wind, and the sun beams down as clouds pass through the mountain range. I spend hours staring up at the clouds that are above me and look down at the clouds that are below me. There are patterns in the clouds, there are patterns I see in my eyes but I am unsure how to explain their shapes and morphing. The clouds give away to images of unicorns, dolphins, and other mystical creatures. I think about César and what the view must look like from higher up the mountain, in moments I am transported to his eyes, a bird’s eye view above the clouds, atop different peaks of 360-degree views of mountains. I feel as though I am a space holder as he traverses above the clouds into 14,000ft. of lofty existence. I can feel the Earth pulsating beneath me and my body captures the lessons where my intelligent mind is unable to grasp the subtleties of sacred matter. Who wants the mind to cloud the pureness of nature? The body, spirit, and soul have a higher understanding of things unseen. All I know…this is the life as a pray for the return of my brother in one piece.
3:15 – César comes back into camp and is freezing, I drape him in his sleeping bag, offer warm tea, delicious snack, and warm blanket. He looks as if he has seen the unseen. His eyes are wide, hands are cold, hair is in all directions, and he is alive! He discusses his epic climb to the summit, above the clouds he stared at them for what seemed like hours. The same clouds I saw below he saw above and we share images, thoughts, and exasperated exclamations of how it is all so unexplainable. On his descent he fell multiple times, became lost, and wandered around the mountain hoping just hoping he could find camp. Luckily he embarked upon a large stone with an arrow we had seen the night before and back tracked, more like re-climbed the mountain again to return home. I am so happy he made it safely because I began to get nervous about his return, praying for him to be safe, and felt him searching, but as any older brother/sister I gave him a little smart-ass remarks on his return and said he has no right to complain since this is the journey he chose. He made it back just in time for him to warm up some, eat a snack, pack up and make it down in time to meet our ride. As there is no cell service and these things must be planned and committed to before departing the presence of those who are helping. The descent down is quick and painless. My focus is getting us to warmth especially after César hiked in a guayabera, a Cuban button down shirt and a small pull over Tibetan hoodie and rain jacket; basically not enough gear to actually stay warm 14,000 ft. Also hunger takes over as coconut strips and little bit of water was all there was to feed me. In the moment and reflection I am nothing more than grateful for his fearlessness to climb to the summit, to have the opportunity to support his quest by holding space energetically, physically, and in prayer, spend time in communion with Mt. Shasta, and the chance to experience the summit through his eyes. Each day since then is constant integration and understanding images I saw, vibrations I experienced, and the union of the stars/planets as they play on my life.
All warm and no longer on the mountain
by April Rameé | Sep 11, 2015 | Travel, Warrior
Lessons on how one shows up in the world. These are what come from days as yesterday. Learning how I react when put into positions different than my desires, although the way is chosen and its fortuitous. I ended where I was going, but not as I wanted to go. Confronting the pain, disappointments, and internal voices saying I made a wrong decision cloud the psyche. In the end, arriving to a place where I am most loved and realizing I am loved the whole journey is the most important lesson to understand. The whole way were guardian angels reaching out to assist the journey. My only block is the way I chose to see certain moments. Restructuring the vision to faith pushes the objective and purpose of life through the lens of love.
I myself was far from an angel in the situation. I made fun of myself and my little pity party. I knew I was being whiny and apologizing for the fact. I am still evolving into a better version of myself. I spent much time reminding myself the lesson of love and the way of the solo wanderer. Reminded that to wander free one must remove attachments to desires and outcomes. Always returning to this understanding but with the nagging sense that I wasn’t going as expected! The expectation of the what….the how. This is the way of travel…the constant surrender.
I share this to enlighten the way of the wanderer and leave you with one of my all time favorite lists from The Book of Five Rings:
THE WAY OF WALKING ALONE (or The Way of Self-Reliance)
- Do not turn your back on the various Ways of this world.
- Do not scheme for physical pleasure.
- Do not intend to rely on anything.
- Consider yourself lightly; consider the world deeply.
- Do not ever think in acquisitive terms.
- Do not regret things about your own personal life.
- Do not envy another’s good or evil.
- Do not lament parting on any road whatsoever.
- Do not complain or feel bitterly about yourself or others.
- Have no heart for approaching the path of love.
- Do not have preferences.
- Do not harbor hopes for your own personal home.
- Do not have a liking for delicious food for youself.
- Do not carry antiques handed down from generation to generation.
- Do not fast so that it affects you physically.
- While it’s different with military equipment, do not be fond of material things.
- While on the Way, do not begrudge death.
- Do not be intent on possessing valuables or a fief in old age.
- Respect the gods and Buddhas, but do not depend on them.
- Though you give up your life, do not give up your honor.
- Never depart from the Way of the Martial Arts.
Second Day of the Fifth Month, Second Year of Shoho [1645]
Shinmen Musashi
Forever yours,
Priestess
by April Rameé | Jul 24, 2015 | Art, Sacred Space
Every year since 2013 a team of us create a space at PEX Summer Festival where divinity, openness, love, and beauty co-exist. In the past years our altars were dedications to the 4 elements, nature, and dream catchers using handmade art, art from the Smithsonian, crystals, deities, rugs, and elements foraged on the land. In this space there is yoga, healing, acupuncture, massage, lectures on herbs, sound healing, kirtan, and late night impromptu ceremonies. This year the space was dedicated to the divine/sacred masculine a topic near and dear to my heart. There are so many directions a topic of divine masculine and feminine can branch into and my main purpose and focus of the space is to create the opening of discussion on the importance of the masculine energy and how to honor, raise the acceptance, and remove the word balance of the feminine and masculine as the main topic and turn it into acceptance of the masculine. How do all of us as humans harness the true power of the masculine energy for the betterment of human kind? Do we really understand the masculine?
Obviously I am not a man, I am a woman who takes pleasure in being surrounded by beautiful men. There is an abundance of wonderful men in this world and I am not sure they always get the credit they deserve nor do the women who harness and use the masculine energy. I grew up feeling closer to men and thinking I was not feminine but some how more of a man. I think this is due to being raised by a tomboy mother, enjoying playing outdoors more than most girls my age, and the fact that I always was really quiet when in a group of girls due to being attacked or made fun by girls for my ideas and preferred honest interactions. My father made sure I knew how to work on cars and enrolled me in martial arts at a young age to learn how to fight. Everything my parents bought me that could be handed down to my brother was bought with the intention of a boy in mind so there was no pink, purple, or many dolls. I played sports with my brother, pushed him around in a box as if it was a race car, and spent most of my time out in the woods alone. I know my story isn’t unique and there are many women out there who relate to this idea of being more masculine than what culturally is accepted as being feminine. If I feel this way isn’t there men who in turn feel the same about existing in our cultural ideology of masculinity? Is this why I relate to the concept of being a man? Wandering around waiting to find my home within the sex of my body? Is this a phenomenon that some human beings experience at some point in their life? A missing piece to feeling whole, like one belongs, and connected to something greater than yourself.
There are discussions of a human cultural identity crisis in the United States, too much patriarchal control. This is not only a hindrance to the growth of the goddess power but to the god power of men. I am not here to way in on if it is bad or good because these days I have a hard time seeing differences. The main point is to start the dialogue, to open the floodgates and allow the masculine to be held up in a positive esteem.
Two of the divine aspects of the masculine energy is giving and supporting. This is viewed sometimes as a feminine trait but is agreed upon in divinity to be a masculine trait. There are many of us that tap into giving and supporting others and not ourselves. There is also this idea of not being able to receive what is given freely. and feminine energy is to receive. I notice that the more I learn how to receive (tap into the feminine) without expecting to give anything in return, I am able to give more freely because I understand what it means to receive a gift given without expectation.
To quote Khalil Gibran of The Prophet, “See first that you yourself deserve to be a giver, and an instrument of giving. For in truth it is life that gives unto life – while you, who deem yourself a giver, are but a witness. And you receivers – and you are ALL receivers – assume no weight of gratitude, lest you lay a yoke upon yourself and upon him who gives. Rather rise together with the giver on his gifts as on wings; For to be overmindful of your debt is to doubt his generosity who has the free-hearted earth for mother, and God for father.”
As I watch beautiful women rise into their Goddess nature, and realize their true purpose, power, I want us women to remember to hold space for the divine masculine to step into their power. I think it is important to make sure as women during our evolution and returning to roots that we bring the men with us, because they are your sons, brothers, fathers, friends, and lovers. We are all human and desire support, love, opportunities to release, and even more opportunities to be part of something bigger and greater.
Therefore I urge everyone to look at their definition of the masculine. Where is the wounded man appearing in your existence of relation with the world? Are you honoring the masculine energy within yourself, your friends, and family? Are you open to the idea of the raw wild energy that comes with being a human? Can you see there is really no difference in the masculine and feminine and creating acceptance of others stems from accepting the wild free self within you, respect for the way others walk in the world and the way they identify themselves?
Check out the space created for the divine masculine at PEX Summer Festival 2015. Thank you to my team, Dean Hively, Philly Baker, Alex Emmerman, and John. I am nothing without your help and the visions I see do not happen without you!
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Panoramic of Inside of Tent
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Walking up to the sacred space.
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The entry into the tent
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Art created by nature and foraged from the land
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Altar space dedicated to divine masculine
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Closer view of the divine masculine altar
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Floating Mask
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Floating Mask
